522- I DON'T REMEMBER. . .

EVER GO SOME WHERE AND DIDN'T REMEMBER WHAT YOU WENT THERE FOR?

Funny, I don't remember being absent minded... God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.
Now that I'm 'older,' here's what I've discovered, that among all things that happen, this is what happened to me:

My wild oats have turned into prunes and All Bran.

I finally got my head together; now my body is falling apart.

Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...

All reports are in; life is now officially unfair.

If all is not lost, where is it?

It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.

Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...

Some days you're the dog; some days you're the hydrant.

I wish the buck stopped here; I sure could use a few.

Kids in the back seat cause accidents.

Accidents in the back seat cause kids.

The only time the world beats a path to your door is when you're in the bathroom.

If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them on my knees.

When I'm finally holding all the cards, why does everyone decide to play chess?

Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...

It's not hard to meet expenses... they're everywhere.

The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter... I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I'm hereafter.

Funny, I don't remember being . . . . . absent minded...

.....GED.....