I know we have a few teachers and school officials in this blogasphere and I'm sure they have heard some doozies too. Well here we go..
Stupid School Excuses (from parents)
Misspellings have been left intact.
Please exkuce Lisa for being absent she was sick and I had to get her shot....
Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.
Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.
John has been absent because he had teeth taken out of his face.
Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.
Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.
Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.
Please excuse Ray Friday from school he has very loose vowels.
Please excuse Pedro from being absent yesterday. He had (diahre, dyrea, direathe), the sh!ts.
Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea, and his boots leak.
Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.
My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the marines.
Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.
Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.
Please excuse Brenda. She has been sick and under the doctor.
Mind you these are from parents and the spelling and phrasing is part of the comedy.