465- BEAUTIFY THE AIRPORT

SUCH A NOVEL IDEA, MAKE THE AIRPORT MORE ATTRACTIVE SO MORE TOURISTS WILL COME.

Well the tourists won't get a chance to see the new efforts if the lights aren't on and you can't get them to come here. They also could have a very traumatic experience, one not soon forgotten, and related to all back home, as to how the power was off and every one was stranded for hours. How hot the plane was and how long the lines were and the wait that seemed forever. I don't think they will remember the art work at all. A short excerpt about the efforts......The ongoing enhancement projects for the Francisco C. Ada Saipan International Airport need the support of the business community in order to move forward. Speaking at yesterday's Rotary Club of Saipan meeting at the Hyatt Regency Saipan, Marianas Visitors Authority project chair Lynn Knight said the airport is a blank canvas that is ready to showcase the beauty, the people and the culture of the CNMI. She said the goals of the project include showcasing exhibits and artwork that would enhance the visitor experience and using the interior spaces at the airport for “niche marketing” to encourage repeat visits to the CNMI......
AND NOW MY HUMBLE SUGGESTION..TRY KEEPING THE POWER ON FIRST!
Maybe that should be the priority!.... .....GED....

464- NIT PICKING

WAY TO GO, GOVERNOR, KEEP PISSING OFF THE VERY PEOPLE THAT ARE TRYING TO HELP YOU.

It seems the governor has no concept as to the problems in the CNMI but instead continues to be block headed and resists all efforts to help fix these problems..... GOVERNOR Benigno R. Fitial accused U.S. Interior Deputy Assistant Secretary for Insular Affairs David Cohen of misusing statistics to drum up support for a pending U.S. Senate bill that will federalize the islands’ immigration system. “Identifying the CNMI as a major offender in this regard was an unnecessary and inappropriate accusation by a Department of Interior official, and we believe that Mr. Cohen owes us an apology,” he added. Fitial demanded an apology but Cohen refused saying the CNMI government should instead focus its energy on solving its problems. “Rather than debating statistics, let’s all acknowledge the obvious,” Cohen said in a statement. “We have a problem here, and we should all work together to address it. Cohen said the real issue is that the local government refuses to acknowledge that problems with its labor and immigration systems exist....... HERE IS THE WHOLE STORY .. By refusing to join in, and offending the very people trying to get us out of the mess he continues to try to thwart the very help we need. Why not participate in the proceedings that are going to happen anyway, and stop being the one to resist every attempt to be helped. Guess the legacy being created here will go down as... Completely missed the boat, clueless, out of touch and good riddance when not reelected. Why he wants to keep the 'down the toilet' status-quo is beyond me. I gotta think there must be some underlying selfish personal benefit for him to remain so ignorant to the obvious.

Surely pissing off the people in Washington can't be to smart, but then we never did call him smart, did we? Way to go! Read this.. MORE LABOR PROBLEMS ..No labor abuses here, no sireee, all is honky dory, not a problem that I can see... And the governor thinks all should remain the same?? MORE RELEVANT INFORMATION from the Washington, D.C. Representive. ......GED......

463- TINA SABLAN

FINALLY THE CNMI GETS SOMEONE RUNNING FOR OFFICE WE CAN COUNT ON

Tina Sablan, A hard working, honest candidate we all will need to support. An excerpt here.....

CITIZENS advocate Christina Marie “Tina” Sablan will run as an independent candidate for one of the six Precinct 1 seats in the House of Representatives. Sablan, 26, the youngest legislative candidate in this year’s elections, said she gave her decision much thought before filing her petition for candidacy on Monday. “It’s actually something that I have been toying with for the last week or so,” she said. “I was thinking about this a lot.” She said she wants to give the public the best service. “Win or lose I know that I’m going to learn a lot (from this),” said Sablan who has a degree in conservation science from the College of Santa Fe in New Mexico. Known for spearheading beautification and conservation efforts, as well for writing articulate editorials and tireless advocacy of clean and transparent government, Sablan was born and raised on Saipan. The whole story here.. VOTE FOR TINA SABLAN .

You Go Girl! We are behind you all the way. I'm sure you will do one heck of a job when you get there, and you will get there. So here's to all the ups and downs, laughs and tears, but mostly the experience it will afford you along the way. Never give up, keep on keeping on. The very best of luck and success to you.

......GED......

462- X-NURSERY RHYMES

PERVERTED NURSERY RHYMES AND A LITTLE MORE

Oasam bin ladin, you son of a bitch. May your balls develop a seven year itch. May your dick be twisted in such a manner, that your asshole whistles the star spangled banner!
Little Boy Blue, come blow your horn, the sheep's in the meadow, the cow's in the corn. Where's the little boy who looks after the sheep? Under the haystack, humping Bo Peep!
Mary had a little sheep, and with that sheep she'd sleep. The sheep turned out to be a ram, Mary had a little lamb.
There once was a girl named Anhauser, who said no man could arouse her, but Pabst took a chance, found the Shlitz in her pants, and now she is sadder, Budweiser.
Here I sit all broken hearted, tried to shit, but only farted. Stepped outside, took a chance, tried to fart, and shit my pants.
Little Johnny wanted some tail, from a woman who had it on sale. Her name was Miss Madge, she carried a badge, and now poor Johnny's in jail.
Viagra: Main Ingredients: 3/4 Fix a flat, 1/4 Miracle Grow

.....GED........

461- DON'T DO THIS

EVERY ONE GETS TO GO TO A JOB INTERVIEW AT ONE TIME OR ANOTHER

Here are a few 'what not to do.' Actually these are the worst things a interviewee could do....

You Can't Take It Back:
Consider these real-life responses from hiring managers who were asked to name the strangest things they had ever heard of happening in a job interview:
"After answering the first few questions, the candidate picked up his cell phone and called his parents to let them know the interview was going well."
"The job seeker halted the conversation about work hours and the office environment, saying she didn't like being confined to a building, but would consider taking the job if she could move her desk to the courtyard outside."
"When asked by the hiring manager why she was leaving her current job, the applicant said, 'My manager is a jerk. All managers are jerks.'"
"After arriving for an early morning interview, the job seeker asked to use the hiring manager's phone. She proceeded to fake a coughing fit as she called in sick to her boss."

So be warned, use your head in the interview room, there is only one chance to make that all important first impression.

......GED.....

460- AND HE SAID, WHAT?

MUMBLE-JUMBLE BULLSHIT WHAT IS THIS?

Read this first by clicking here A LEGAL PILE OF CRAP then you explain it to me by clicking on "comments" and write what it means please. I want to know, I am terribly confused.

Man if you have ever heard a bigger pile of crap then this 'legal turkey buzzard' spewed out it must have been huge. This crock of shit 'takes the cake' for being the most stupidest thing I ever couldn't understand. How about you, can you explain this? I doubt it. Why make something as simple as the OGA (Open Government Act) so goddamn confusing? This is the biggest attempt ever to baffle with bullshit I have ever seen. All that is being ask is this, and its very simple...We want elected government officials to be transparent about what they do and what they spend. Can you understand that? I can, but why the hell some idiot has to confuse shit I can't understand. Throw out all incumbents if they don't get a grip on reality... .....GED....

459- HE FINALLY DID IT!

CROSSING HOME PLATE, MAKING HISTORY: The first part....SAN DIEGO – Barry Bonds reached Hank Aaron in the second inning Saturday night with a hard, opposite-field blast at Petco Park, his 755th career home run bringing a sellout crowd to its feet to cheer and to boo, the conflicting reaction matching a national ambivalence to the feat. He is one home run from owning the record outright, a mark many consider the most sacred in sports, one that Aaron held alone since surpassing Babe Ruth in 1974.
The second part.... San Francisco Giants' Barry Bonds waves to the crowd as he leaves the field after hitting a home run, his 755th, during the second inning of their Major League Baseball game against the San Diego Padres in San Diego, Saturday, Aug. 4, 2007. With the hit, Bonds caught Hank Aaron and tied the career home run record.

But it's not over yet, there needs to be one more home run to set a new record @ 756.... Go Barry Go.. .....GED....

458- FATHERLY ADVICE

TO ALL YOU YOUNG STUDS, THE GUYS IN YOUR PRIME , IN THE 30's, HERE'S TO YOU

I need not call out any names, but you know who you are.. I will personally give you some facts of life, that are, for you guys, free, here is what I'm going to say. If you are 30 something you are in the prime of your life when everything is going for you, I know, been there, done that. This is the time all goes well for you, jobs, money, career, pussy, health, vim and stamina etc. the only problem with you guys here, in the CNMI, is this, you only have dozens of women to play with, yes only a few. Think about Texas, how many women do you think are there? I'll tell you, thousands, not dozens. You are limiting you ability to score women by being here. Your life is being stifled, minimized, and under privileged by being here. Get the hell outta here and go really live. A wise older guy once told me this...When the few women here start to look good, get the hell outta here and go back to the states and get your head back on straight. Now that is your lesson for the day. .....GED.....

457- BULLSHIT PRAYERS

OR IS IT PRAYERS AND BULLSHIT?

Now don't get me wrong.. We always pray (bullshit) for the unfortunate, and say, I will pray for you and your family. Every news commentator on TV says this bullshit.. " I will pray for you and your family. Or "our prayers are with you." But when the newscast is over , do you think they give a little rats ass about other peoples problems? Not a chance. So let me see them down on their knees saying...Dear God, help all the people that fell off the I-35 bridge. Save their souls from hell and give them a place in heaven. Never happens, all bullshit, I don't believe them. Show me the tapes of these sympathetic assholes praying. Let me see you down on your knees, saying, "Lord, please help them." Show me the tears in your eyes, please don't keep saying "we're praying for you," or "our prayers are with you" anymore , cause you don't really mean it. You are so full of shit that I can't even believe you would keep saying that, over and over again. Even the president says, Laura's prayers and my prayers go out to you, now that is bullshit too. When was the last time you actually prayed for someone else and meant it? Loooonnnng time ago wasn't it. You never prayed for anyone, other then yourself, when you were afraid and needed help, that's when you prayed, only when you needed it for your own selfish self, Yup, and I didn't pray either.

......GED......

456- BOMB IRAN

DID YOU EVER FEEL LIKE YOU WOULD LIKE TO GET A FEW LICKS IN ON YOUR OWN? NOW HERE IS YOUR CHANCE TO FART ON IRAN. JUST CLICK ON "BOMB IRAN" AND GIVE 'ER HELL.
Now I know I am saying Iran (not Iraq) We don't want to bomb Iraq, but need to bomb Iran. So the image you see is (think Iran) BOMB IRAN
Bombs away! ......GED.......

455- CHICKEN SHIT AND STRAWBERRIES

A CHICKEN TAKING A SHIT WHILE THINKING ABOUT STRAWBERRIES AND CREAM
Now what does that have to do with anything? Well just read the following little story and you will know..
A farmer was driving along the road with a load of chicken shit. A little boy, playing in front of his house, saw him and called out, "What've you got in your truck?" "Chicken shit," the farmer replied."What are you going to do with it?" asked the little boy. "Put it on strawberries," answered the farmer. "You ought to live here," the little boy advised him. "We put sugar and cream on ours." Which do you prefer on your strawberries? ( click on pic.)
MORE CHICKEN SHIT..
A man passes by a restaurant sign that says "Unusual Breakfast"
He goes inside and asks the waitress "What is your unusual breakfast?"
She replies, "Fried Chicken Tongue."
"Fried chicken tongue! I would never eat anything that came out of a chickens mouth!"
"Well what will you have then?" she asks.
"Oh, just give me some scrambled eggs".
.........GED........

454 A COUPLA DRUNKS

WHETHER YOU DRINK 'UM, CHUG 'UM, SLAM 'UM OR POUND 'UM IT ALL COMES TO ONE HEAD..YOURS
And that can spell trouble, but one fact remains, and it will never change, you will get drunk, shitfaced drunk. Now here is the rest of the story.........

A man is at the bar, really drunk. Some guys decide to be good Samaritans and get him home. So they pick him up off the floor, and drag him out the door. On the way to the car, he falls down three times. When they get to his house, they help him out of the car and, he falls down four more times. They ring the bell, and one says, "Here's your husband! "The man's wife says, "Where the hell is his wheelchair?".....

A cop pulls over a car and asks the driver why he isn't wearing his seat belt. The driver says: "Officer, I always wear my seat belt. I must have just forgotten."The man's wife says: "Aw come on honey! You never wear your seat belt! "To which the husband replies: "Shut up you old cow! "So the cop asks: "Does he always yell at you like that?" To which she replies: "Only when he's drunk!" ...... Couldn't have said it any better myself... .....GED.........

453- A STORY IN IDIOMS

A SHORT STORY, SEEKING A JOB
It's just another 'run of the mill' anecdote: I woke up early this morning 'at the crack of dawn' and 'feeling my oats' I decided I needed to 'make hay while the sun shines' so I thought I'd 'press my luck' and 'pull a few strings' down at the employment agency. So I 'grabbed a bite' and 'hit the road' knowing that it was 'a shot in the dark' to 'have great expectations' about my 'cold day in hell' chances of 'landing the big one.' To make things worse I was 'running on borrowed time' trying to get there 'faster than a bat outta hell' and be all 'bright eyed and bushy tailed' for my 'chance of a lifetime' meeting with the man who was 'holding the bag' of 'of missed opportunities' for others who took 'a swing in the dark, and missed'. Well I arrived just 'in the nick of time' to see 'my life flash before my eyes' when a huge truck 'scared the living shit outta me' and had me running 'like a raped ape' to 'dodge the bullet' hurtling toward me like a 'streak of white lighting'. But by 'a stroke of luck' all 'things turned out for the better' so I 'took a shot' at 'regaining my senses' and entered the agency to see if I could still 'get a lucky break' and 'catch some vibes' as to what the 'job at hand' may be. Well 'to make a long story short' I was 'shit outta luck' when the agent 'sent me packing' with my 'tail between my legs' and and told me not to 'cry over spilt milk' and that there 'are better days ahead' if only I would 'keep my chin up' and stop 'crying like a baby' so I 'kissed my ass good bye' and 'took it on the chin' knowing that 'that's the way the ball bounces.' And now the rest is history..... ....GED....

452- YOU'VE GOT MAIL

WELL YOU COULD HAVE FOOLED ME TOO
Sometimes the little trivial things in life seem to confuse even the most seemly normal people, people who sometimes don't grasp the "real" reality of daily things. Oft confused by small minor directions these people can be relegated to a life of confusion, and disarray, as depicted in the following anecdote: A man was in his front yard mowing grass, when his attractive blonde female neighbor, Judy, came out of her house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it, then slammed it shut and stormed back into the house. A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mail box, and again opened it and slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?" To which she replied, "There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps saying, YOU'VE GOT MAIL." But there is never any there! .... So be it, but for the diligence of my teachers, there go I. Whats in your mailbox? .....GED.....

451- JACK AND JILL

...........GED.........

450- A QUIZ

SOMETHING TO MAKE YOU DO THE SAME THING TWO OR THREE TIMES
See if you don't find yourself doing this puzzle/quiz more than once, I'll bet you will find yourself doing like what Santa does to his list..checking it twice.
Here is the quiz....
Okay, think of a number from 1 to 10, now multiply it by x 9. If it is a double didget number then add them together.
Now subtract -5, to get your number.
Take your number and choose a letter using the following seqence: 1=A, 2=B, 3=C, 4=D etc.
Now think of a COUNTRY that starts with your letter.
Now take the last letter in that country and think of a ANIMAL that starts with that letter.
Take the last letter of the animal and think of a FRUIT that starts with that letter.
Do you have an animal, a fruit and a country?
Now check my answer in "comments". See if you have what I have.
You are going to run through this again, just like I said, aren't you? .....GED.....

449- IT WAS THE DOG

GUYS FART, GALS POOT, BUT ITS ALWAYS THE DOGS FAULT

The dog always gets the blame as you will see here in this little short doggie tail. (I know I wrote tail.).. A guy goes to pick up his date for the evening. She's not ready yet, so he has to sit in the living room with her parents. He has a bad case of gas and really needs to relieve some pressure. Luckily, the family dog jumps up on the couch next to him. He decides that he can let a little fart out and if anyone notices they will think that the dog did it.
He farts, and the woman yells, "Spot, get down from there."
The guy thinks, "Great, they think the dog did it." He releases another fart, and the woman again yells for the dog to get down.
This goes on for a couple more farts. Finally the woman yells, "Dammit Spot, get down before he shits on you." Sometimes you won't get away with blaming the dog, so be discreet! ....GED....

448- CASINOS

GREED ONLY SETS IN WHEN THERE IS MONEY, LOTS OF MONEY, EASY MONEY, NOT BEFORE

Friday, August 03, 2007: Saipan casino proponents: We're a "clean" group. Aware of possible public skepticism, proponents of the Saipan casino initiative said that their organization is “clean” and has the broader CNMI interest in mind. Vicente Santos, former educator, House speaker and Covenant negotiator, said the CNMI Indigenous Enterprise Corp., which is behind the Saipan casino initiative, started it with a goal “to be very clean from the beginning.” Santos, who serves as adviser of the enterprise group, said that no organization or committee has ever succeeded in pushing for a Saipan casino. “There was one group formed several years ago but it didn't work. One thing I want to stress is that we want this group to be very clean from the beginning,” he said.-- THE WHOLE STORY HERE-- Well we all know what they mean by "clean" don't we, as they have referred to it several times already.
"Clean" means they are above board, honest, not on the take and not stealing and cheating. This is always the case for any new enterprise when someone is trying to sell something to the rest of the public. Almost akin to a government official trying to get elected, if you know what I mean. Baffle everyone with bullshit until you are elected then do whatever the hell you want, cause its to late for anyone to change their minds. In this case these "clean operators" for the casino, will of course, say they are "clean" and they will remain "clean" UNTIL A LOT OF MONEY ROLLS IN. Why be on the take when there is no money to take? Watch and see what happens if the casino becomes successful and there are a lot of big bucks involved, things will turn "dirty" and "dirty people" will start to get greedy, I friggin' guarantee it, there will be "dirty" hands reaching in the pot. But never mind me, I don't know how shit goes down around here nearly as well as all of you do, so I'm sure that I'm wrong and there is certainly no need for concern, you all know that, don't you? ...... Wait and watch... .....GED.......

447- REDNECKS

REDNECKS, THE GOOD OLE GUYS AND GALS FROM THE SOUTH
Redneck colors, Red, White and Blue. Red is for the redneck, White is for white trash and Blue is for blue collars. So how do you tell if you are a redneck? Here are some signs..Signs You Might Be A Redneck: You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.
You think "taking out the trash" means taking your in-laws to a movie.
You take a load to the dump and bring back more than you took.
You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.
You ever cut your grass and found a car.
The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your wife.
Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.
You think taking a bubble bath starts with eating beans for dinner.
You've got more than one brother named 'Darryl'.
You own a homemade fur coat.
The people on Jerry Springer's show remind you of your neighbors.
You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.
You can get dog hair from out of your belly button.
The beer can collection in the town museum is the big tourist attraction.
People hear your car a long time before they see it...................... So there you have it. If any of these dang things relate you, you could be a redneck... .....GED.....

446- HITLESS & HOMERLESS

STUCK AT 754, BARRY BONDS FINDS SETTING THE RECORD ELUSIVE

Giants super slugger is stuck, stuck on the number 754, only one home run away from tying the world home run record, set by the Atlanta Braves great Hank Aaron. The magic number is 755 Aaron's record, and 756 will be the new world home run record. Some latest sports shorts.......
LOS ANGELES (AP) - Barry Bonds looks as if he's lost that picture-perfect swing.
With thousands of cameras flashing at every pitch that came his way, the slugger struggled again to find the impeccable hand-eye coordination that has defined his 22-year career. Bonds went hitless and remained at 754 home runs and one from tying Hank Aaron's record in the Giants' 6-4 loss to the Dodgers on Wednesday night. See I told you so...I think 755 must be a big bump in the road for Bonds and he will probably be happier than a pig in mud when it's finally accomplished. There is one small glitch in all this record setting and its the use of steroids. This is casting a long shadow over the actual accomplishment as lots of people are crying "foul", and that's not for the foul balls, but foul play, otherwise called by some as cheating. Now I'm not here to hash all that shit out but to point out the fact he's stuck in a rut at 754. We'll all be glad when this is finally over. Well I think this post is over too.. ....GED....

445- A TOUGH NIGHT OUT

A JAG HE CAN'T REMEMBER, BUT ONE HE'LL NEVER FORGET

You just can't take this kind of shit back, it'll haunt you forever.
JOHNSON CITY, Tenn. — A minister and Christian radio station employee has been charged with indecent exposure as well as DUI and violation of the open container law, the Kingsport Times-News reported. Tommy Tester, 58, of Bristol, Va., was arrested last week by Johnson City police after they say he urinated in front of children at a car wash.. Police also said Tester, who was wearing a skirt,...... offered to perform oral sex on officers who responded to the car wash. Tester is the pastor of Gospel Baptist Church on Reedy Creek Road in Bristol and works for Christian radio station WZAP-AM. The radio station’s owner, Al Morris, issued a statement Monday saying, "We do not know all the details and facts concerning the arrest; but for the time being Tommy has been relieved of his responsibilities. "Morris told the paper that when he spoke with him, Tester said the Johnson City police had scared the begeebees outta him. "He was scared to death and didn't know what he'd said, what he'd admitted to or anything else he did," Morris said. Tester was released Friday on $1,000 bond. A hearing is scheduled for Oct. 25..... A boys night out, or is it something like, a fuCkEd up dudes night out. A minister and a gospel radio show employee, going to hell in a clean car. A total blackout, a scary thing indeed. Buddy you will NEVER live this down, no sireee, not for the rest of your years. It doesn't matter what you did in all your life before this and everything that you will do after this, this is how you will be remembered, FOREVER!...
.........GED.......

444- THE DOG IS FREE!

WHO LET THE DOG OUT, MEXICO "THE DOG IS FREE"
Here was the problem, this is old news......GUADALAJARA, Mexico — A federal court has cleared the way for TV bounty hunter Duane "Dog" Chapman to be extradited to face charges in Mexico, but the decision can still be appealed. Norma Jara, a spokeswoman for the second district court in Guadalajara, said Thursday the court rejected Chapman's injunction request, ruling there was no reason not to try him on charges he illegally arrested Max Factor makeup heir and convicted rapist Andrew Luster in 2003. "We only just heard about the Mexican court's decision to continue with the extradition proceedings, and are still in shock," Chapman and his wife, Beth, said in a statement issued Thursday night in Honolulu. "Our attorneys have not even been formally informed of the court's decision, as of yet. We are obviously deeply disappointed and fearful of what will happen, and are currently absorbing the news and discussing our options at this time. "Once Chapman has been formally notified of the decision, he has five days to file an appeal that could block his extradition. Mexican authorities have already asked for Chapman's extradition from Hawaii. Chapman's lawyers argue he would not be guaranteed a fair trial in Mexico. MORE OF THE STORY
THE DOG IS EXONERATED, CASE CLOSED!
Free at last, thank god almighty, I'm free at last. This must be the theme that must be echoing around Honolulu today. Yup, no more, completely outta there. The Dog and family gotta be very happy campers.
More updates as they develop.
THE LATEST RIGHT HERE
Chapman raised his arm, gave a big shaka, and the crowd cheered. "The weight has been lifted off my chest," he said. "Viva la Mexico!"
THE FINAL CHAPTER
........GED.........

443- BEFORE AND AFTER

CELEBRITIES, FAMOUS, NOT SO FAMOUS AND
IRRELEVANT
Sometimes things change, usually for the better, so we are gonna take a look at some before and afters, see who improved and who went south.
<--- Improved

<--- Went South

For more click:
A SURPRISE
Stars without
make-up.








<---Irrelevant

.......GED......

442- WHO'S THIS?

A PHONE CONVERSATION WITH A MYSTERIOUS CALLER FOR SOME GUY NAMED BEN....
It was last Wednesday night, and I was sitting in my room watching TV when the phone rang. The conversation, word for word transpired like this... "Hello?" I said. A girl's voice came over the line. "Can I speak to Ben, please?" I live by myself, and my name definitely is not Ben. It was probably a wrong number and I was bored, so I replied, "I'm sorry, he's not in right now. Can I take a message?" "Do you know what time he'll be back?" she responded. "I think he said he'd be home around 10:00." Silence on the other end... a confused silence. "Is this Steve?" My name isn't Steve, either. This was definitely a wrong number. So I replied, "Yes, it is. Do you want to leave a message for Ben?" "Well... he said he would be home tonight and asked me to call him," she said in a slightly irritated voice. I replied, "Well, he went out with Karen about an hour ago, and said that he would be back at 10:00. "A shocked voice now: "Who's Karen?!" "The girl he went out with." "I know that! I mean... who is she?" "I don't know her last name. Look, do you want me to leave a message for Ben?" "Yes... please do. Tell him to call me when he gets home. "She was sounding pretty irate at this point, and I could hear her temper flaring. "I sure will. Is this Jennifer?" I asked. She exploded, "Who's Jennifer?" Apparently, she wasn't. "Well... he's going out with Jennifer at 10:00. I thought you were her. Sorry... it was an honest mistake." "Ben's the one that's made the mistake! she huffed, "Tell him that Alice called him and the she's very upset and that I would like him to call me as soon as he gets home. "I smiled and said, "Okay, I will... but Becky isn't going to like this..."*Click*...... Well I'm sure I made her day, she was pissed to say the least. Guess I should set her straight if she calls again.. .......GED.......

441- FAILED ATTEMPTS

BUSINESSES THAT JUST DIDN'T MAKE IT.

Everyone, at times get a brainstorm for a new business concept. Some of these ideas are rock solid and become successful enterprises. Others, on the other hand, are duds, flop, never work, never will. Some never get off the ground, and here are some of these Einstien ideas that didn't work....Business Ideas that Somehow Failed:
Geriatric City: Quality housing for older citizens that couldn't attract retirees, despite the mirrored bedroom ceilings, the hot tubs, the adjacent burial plots and other amenities.
Pump and Hump: A Nevada brothel that offered self-service gasoline to its customers.
Sticky Wickets: Pre-owned erotica toys for sale at attractive discount prices.
Hair and Now: Fast, inexpensive hair replacement using cat fur and thumb tacks.
Paradise Lost and Found: A gynecological clinic franchise specializing in "50,000 mile tune-ups".
UNIX for Hire: A computer consulting firm that just couldn't build a long-term customer base.

In the Closet: A line of closet organizers that never caught on with young marrieds and new homeowners.
Scratch and Sniff: A new medication for hemorroids...available in all your favorite fragrances.

Some novel ideas indeed, can't figure out just why they didn't work. .....GED.....