565- "NEW" LIGHTHOUSE

A TRANSFORMATION INDEED!

On September 7th I wrote a post (#555) depicting the disgusting conditions of the "old" lighthouse. Well it seems some citizens took it upon themselves to remedy the conditions the government, MVA or whoever controls the place (DPL?) failed to do themselves. A special thanks to Angelo Villagomez, Beautify CNMI, FMI, Bree, Cinta, and many more who pitched in to help. What a super job! Job well done! You all must be complimented for your care and concern for the quality of this island. Kudos to everyone! More: THE WHOLE STORY PART ONE, - THE WHOLE STORY PART TWO
Stories part I and part II compliments of Angelo Villagomez. Thank you, Angelo!

....GED.....

564- ON AUSSIES

A LITTLE FUN WITH THE MATES FROM DOWN UNDER JUST SO - YOU KNOW - THE LINGO.

I found this little piece of modern interpretation of the Aussie slanguage and thought it would help all in a time of a face to face meeting with a true native Aussies. This will help you communicate with ease and make every one more comfortable.
.....GED.....

563- 9-11 MEMORIAL

A TRIBUTE TO ALL AMERICANS ON 9-11

Everyone knows this story. Everyone knows how they felt when they first saw the live news coverage, when they saw the planes hit the World Trade Centers, when they saw the buildings came crashing down. Every one knows how it affected them then and how it is still affecting our lives now. Everyone has their own grief and feelings about this horrific event. So I'll let everyone remember and pay homage in their own personal way.

NEVER AGAIN!

Click here to see flag wave

.....GED.....

562- TAN LINES

THE TALE OF THE TAN LINES

Interesting, isn't it?

.....GED.....

543- To set the record straight

561- IS THAT TRUE

CALLING OUT "BULLSHIT" WHEN YOU HEAR IT

You will find me, like kids playing a game of tag and a kid calls out "your it" that I will call out "Bullshit" every time I hear it or when it appears in the news or anywhere in public. These definite moments of certain bullshitting sessions will not be immune from my detection at any time. There will be no free passes, bases or off limits when someone proceeds to emit piles of bullshit. Well the following article that I just read in the news is a classic case of bullshitting and can not go undetected and therefore susceptible to be called "Bullshit" READ IT ALL HERE

Here it is in part....Governor didn’t mean to call all protesting workers ‘illegals:’ PRESS Secretary Charles P. Reyes Jr. says Gov. Benigno R. Fitial’s description of protesting alien workers as “illegals” during the Aug. 15 U.S. House Subcommittee on Insular Affairs public hearing was “misunderstood.” Congressman Eni Faleomavaega asked Fitial how the CNMI government would address the concerns of the protesting alien workers outside the Guma Hustisia.“They are illegals,” Fitial replied. “We’re processing them and they will soon be deported. They deliberately destroyed their passports.” U.S. Interior Deputy Assistant Secretary David Cohen said he was disappointed with the governor’s statement. As for complaints that Fitial rolled down his car window and shouted “Go home” at some of the workers, Reyes said the governor never did any such thing. “It’s completely false,” said Reyes. “Why did they say that? Obviously, they support federalization. They are trying to discredit us. We respect their freedom of speech but don’t misrepresent the truth.”

Do you know bullshit when you hear it? Well take a lesson here. This is my lesson to you for today. What you have just read above and in the newspaper is "Bullshit" learn to identify this immoral crap. When something isn't even close to what you consider the truth, even streached truth, this is then classified as bullshit. You must learn to notice and identify it. What is written above, ask yourself. Do I believe this? If your answer is no, or even maybe not, then you have learned to identify bullshit. You have now been informed. Keep alert for many more cases of bullshitting as the elections get closer and closer. More and more people will start bullshitting over and over and the bullshit will get deeper and deeper. Be aware and remember your lesson you had today. You may now be excused.

.....GED.....

560- MYSTIC BALL

THIS ONE REALLY IS A HUMDINGER

I cannot figure this one out. I'll admit it. Try your hand and mind at it.
Click on.. MYSTIC CRYSTAL BALL and see if you can fool it.
You must do the math, you cannot pick random numbers. Do the math!

P.S.. I got it! Now see if you can.

Please let me know if you get it! .....GED.....

559- WHERE IS #558?

THE MYSTERY OF THE # 558

Bruce, are you waiting for the 558 story? I'll put it out Monday, 9/10/07.

For the rest of ya'll..You see the question was, why did you choose the #558 in your blog title? Is it something special? Is it your birthday or something similar? Maybe the number of women you've had? Does it really relate to something or mean anything? Well I'll tell you all where the number 558 originated, how I got it and why I used it in my blog title. I will reveal it all in post #558. So you'll see soon!
.....GED.....

558- "558" THE STORY

THE STORY BEHIND THE NUMBER "558"

Someone was asking me what I would do for post #558, that being the number in my blog title.

He ask why I had picked that number. So I told him I would tell the story behind the number, so here it is.

"558" - THE STORY

Once upon a time there was a lad
Who really loved to speed
Then he found out with a doubt
The way to feed the need.

He bought a car, man it was fine
It really flew indeed.
Split second time right off the line
120 top end speed.

He cut the lights, slammed the gear
Held throttle to the floor.
No one was near, not once a fear
Cause he had slammed the door.

He took the trophy and the cash
The feeling it was great.
He wowed the crowd, sure felt proud
In car called "558."

The number 558 was assigned to my drag racing car in Hawaii by the NHRA officials. So #558 was my official racing entry and car number.
While building some golf courses in Hawaii I happened across a jet black ’69 Chevy Nova in full drag racing condition and ready to run. So I bought the car and raced it for three seasons until hurricane Nikki put an end to most things happening in Kauai at the time, so that was the end of the racing era. When I got the car the original builder agreed to maintain the wrenching and tuning of the car so it was a really good deal, see it came with a whole pit crew too, and they were all professionals, so all I really had to do was drive it. (And pay the bills.) In the course of the three seasons I accumulated 8 trophies and 1 championship, a rather unique accomplishment for a new guy. I ran two different classes, one was bracket racing wherein you run a dial in time or a handicap and the Jr. Pro Gas class, this is running a set time for the class. The E.T. for Jr. Pro Gas was 11.80 seconds for the quarter mile.
The first thing I can truly say about drag racing is it is the greatest adrenalin rush in the world, it is actually better then sex. The problem with racing though is it only lasts 11.8 seconds, but I’ve had sex for longer periods of time then that, surely! So maybe we can call it a draw.
The second thing about drag racing is the camaraderie, there wasn’t anything you could ask a competitor for that he wouldn’t help you with. The feeling was, I want to beat him heads up not win by default. So if someone needed a part or some help everyone pitched in. Now I could go on and on, telling this story for a long time but all I wanted to do at this point was explain why I used the number 558 when I needed a random number to complete my blog name. So there you have a small part of the history of the ‘558’.

.....GED.....

557- IRONIC OR BAD LUCK?

IT SEEMS THERE'S JUST SOME THINGS THAT ARE SIMPLY TO IRONIC TO BE REAL. OR IS IT JUST REALLY BAD LUCK?

But shit happen anyway, as you will see here.......

Stupidity or Irony? The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez oil spill in Alaska was $80, 000. At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively saved animals were released back into the wild amid cheers and applause from onlookers. A minute later, in full view, a killer whale ate them both.

A psychology student in New York rented out her spare room to a carpenter in order to nag him constantly and study his reactions. After weeks of needling, he snapped and beat her with an axe leaving her mentally retarded.

A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen, shaking frantically with what looked like a wire running from his waist towards the electric kettle. Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current she whacked him with a handy plank of wood by the back door, breaking his arm in two places. Until that moment he had been happily listening to his Walkman.

Two animal rights protesters were protesting the cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn Germany. Suddenly the pigs, all two thousand of them, escaped through a broken fence and stampeded, trampling the two hapless protesters to death.

Iraqi terrorist, Khay Rahnajet, didn't pay enough postage on a letter bomb. It came back with "return to sender" stamped on it. Forgetting it was the bomb, he opened it and was blown to bits.... So how is your luck running these days? Keep your eyes open your mind alert, and have a nice day!
.....GED.....

556- ODDS AND ENDS

A FEW SIMPLE THINGS TO KEEP YOU AMUSED FOR A FEW MINUTES

First some Country song titles.... The rest, well you'll see!

15- If I Can't Be Number One In Your Life, I'll Number Two On You

14- If The Phone Don't Ring, You'll Know It's Me

13- How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away?

12- I Liked You Better Before I Got to Know You So Well

11- I Still Miss You Baby, But My Aim's Gettin' Better

10- I Won't Take Her To A Dog Fight 'Cause I'm Afraid She'd Win

9- I'll Marry You Tomorrow But Let's Honeymoon Tonight

8- I'm So Miserable Without You It's Almost Like You're Here

7- If I Had Shot You When I Wanted To I'd Be Out Of Prison Now

6- My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend And I Sure Do Miss Him

5- She Got The Ring And I Got The Finger

4- You're The Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly

3- Her Teeth Was Stained But Her Heart Was Pure

2- She's Looking Better After Every Beer

1- I Never Went To Bed With An Ugly Women, but I've Sure Woke Up With Some.

CLICK ON THESE LINKS FOR SOME AMUSING RESULTS!

BEFORE BEERS TO AFTER 6 BEERS Works every time!
HOW BEER WORKS Ten beer theory.
EYE TEST I'll bet you need to get out of your chair to see this!

Enjoy your day!

.....GED.....

555- DISGUSTING

DISGUSTING, THE ONLY WORD TO USE (You must click on pic's)

A couple of days ago I met a friend for a coupla' drinks, she had a Japanese tourist 'customer' with her at the time. In the course of conversation the 'tourist' took out her camera to show me what she did and where she had been. These photos are what she showed me, the ones she will take home to show all her friends. I'll let the pictures explain themselves. That's all.... .....GED.....

554- NEW NFL SEASON

ITS THE COLTS AND THE SAINTS, THE BEGINNING OF THE NFL FOOTBALL SEASON

As I stated in an earlier post, I was choosing the N.O. Saints to root for this season. This is not a prediction as to who will be the best and go to the Super Bowl, but just a team to root for. I think they have a good chance of being a really good team this year. I like pulling for an underdog with a chance to be great, so I'm choosing the Saints. My first loyalty was to the Miami Dolphins, seeing I lived in Florida for quiet some time, so they will always be my 'home' team. This year it's the Saints. Anyone who wants to discuss teams, games, players, or anything that comes to mind, come on, place your comments and thoughts here. May the best team's prevail! So to all you footballers out there...Here we go!

.....GED.....

553- IS BIGGER, BETTER?

A PERSONAL SHORT STORY

Also why I'm in a wheelchair with a broken arm...

BREAST ENLARGEMENT PLAN:
A few weeks ago my wife was standing in front of the mirror after taking a shower and she started complaining to me that she thought her breasts were too small. She started wishing she could somehow get them to grow bigger without going through an expensive and somewhat risky procedure. I told her I had the perfect and secret solution to enlarge her breasts slowly and over a long period of time, thus not taking any unwarranted risks. Well she perked up immediately at the thought of having larger breasts without any complications and demanded that I tell her immediately what the secret to growing larger breasts was. So I told her the secret was to take a piece of toilet tissue and rub it gently between her breasts everyday at least three times. After diligently following my recommendation for a few weeks she started to doubt the wisdom of my method of breast enlargement. So the other morning she she confronted me with her doubts of the method I had offered and that she had faithfully followed for weeks. "How do you know this will work?" she demanded of me. So I replied "It sure worked on your ass didn't it?" It's tough typing this piece with a broken arm while sitting in a wheelchair, but the doctor says I'll be able to walk in a few months.

.....GED.....

552- HELL TEST

TAKE THIS TEST.. ARE YOU GOING TO HELL?.. CLICK HERE

Answer 50 simple questions..get the results, then consult the book.

(after loading, double click 'next')
.....GED.....

551- E-MAILS - H.of R.

DOES EVERYONE HAVE THE E-MAIL ADDRESSES OF OUR CONGRESSMEN AND WOMEN? WELL IF YOU DON'T HERE THEY ARE..
THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES
Now you have them...use them!
cnmiservant@cintakaipat.com,
rep.adam@cnmileg.gov.mp,
rep.aldane@cnmileg.gov.mp,
rep.awakijr@cnmileg.gov.mp,
rep.delacruzf@cnmileg.gov.mp,
rep.dlguerreroj@cnmileg.gov.mp,
rep.lizamaj@cnmileg.gov.mp,
rep.ogoc@cnmileg.gov.mp,
rep.palaciosa@cnmileg.gov.mp,
rep.quituguaj@cnmileg.gov.mp,
rep.semanb@cnmileg.gov.mp,
rep.tamanc@cnmileg.gov.mp,
rep.tebutebr@cnmileg.gov.mp,
rep.tenoriom@cnmileg.gov.mp,
rep.torress@cnmileg.gov.mp,
rep.yumulr@cnmileg.gov.mp,
rep.dlguerrerof@cnmileg.gov.mp
So where is Babauta, speaker of the house?
Is he hiding away, like a timid little mouse
He's not on this list, so you know, of course
He don't want your mail. and no recourse.... recourse.
Write and let them know just what you are thinking...
.....GED.....

550- WHAT IS THE TRUTH?

CHRIS YOU NEED TO EXPLAIN THIS AND THE SOONER THE BETTER

Chris what is up with this? You need to come forth and explain what this is about. We will give you the benefit of the doubt if you can clear this up. Don't dodge behind the 'innocent until proven guilty' shit, come forth and explain it before the election! Stand up and explain, we are all tired of all this government bullshit. Be a man and come clean! This is what is being written about you in the news....... THE WHOLE STORY

THE Federal Bureau of Investigation is looking into the office operations of Rep. Crispin M. Ogo following complaints that the lawmaker may be engaged in a “ghost employee” scheme — the same offense that sent two senators to federal prison. Ogo, Covenant-Rota and chairman of the House Committee on Ways and Means, is a candidate for senator. The complainant said Ogo retains the mother-in-law of his brother who does not report for work. “No wonder Congressman Ogo doesn’t support Open Government legislation,” the complainant told Public Auditor Mike Sablan in a letter dated Aug. 13. “He has so many ghost employees in his office. He has had an employment contract for many months now with a Ms. Lucy Quitugua. She is the mother-in-law of his brother and she does not report for work anywhere…. A staffer on vacation in the states is being clocked in and still gets her paycheck.”

So what say ye? We want the truth, no bull, write a rebuttal in the local paper or make a public announcement and tell us what's happening. It is important to have this cleared up immediately!

.....GED.....

549- SHALL I STOP?

SHOULD I GIVE UP ON CRITICIZING LOCAL IDIOTS?

A fellow blogger recently made the statement that she might discontinue blogging, just as I might stop calling attention to idiotic people and their ignorant rants and actions. If she can stop blogging then I certainly can stop calling out the really stupid people. My reason for this change of heart is I've finally come to realize, they don't know any better, they actually are really stupid and should be pitied, rather then scoffed. Meager minds and no worldly experience, the formula for stupid comments. I know that I should refrain from picking on these disadvantaged people, should give them a break, listen to their frightened responses to anything new or different, offer my support for their fears and be a nice guy to them. What do you think? Stop? Keep on?

Well hell no I ain't gonna stop, and if you think that I will, your an idiot too! Like my friend mentioned above, who isn't gonna stop blogging, I'll not stop calling out the idiots. It is just no fun to hear really ridiculous rants and not make a comment about them. I am a hopeless critic, but I can stop anytime..... If I really want to... But just let me say this one more thing....... I just wanna say this........

.....GED.....

548- SAVE THE REDHEADS!

ALERT! ANOTHER ENDANGERED SPECIES, WE MUST BE DILIGENT!

It has come to my attention there is another endangered spices and we must take full control not to let this ever happen. Can you imagine a world without redheads, and guys I'm talking about the female of the species, redheaded women, they must never be allowed to cease to exist. Here is some information about the upcoming crisis......

Redheads Face Extinction: Redheads are becoming rarer and could be extinct in 100 years, according to genetic scientists. The current National Geographic magazine reports that less than two per cent of the world’s population has natural red hair, created by a mutation in northern Europe thousands of years ago. Global intermingling, which broadens the availability of possible partners, has reduced the chances of redheads meeting and producing little redheads of their own....

So to all you gentlemen out there who have never experienced the passionate, love making fury of a redheaded lady, do so before it's forever to late. You will not regret it, of ever forget it!

.....GED.....

547- SPOUTING FOOLS

A NEW IDIOT COMES FORTH SPOUTING REMARKS ONLY TO HELP FEDERALIZATION HAPPEN QUICKER

The dumber you keep sounding, the more you piss them off, the sooner shit will happen, and all the time with less and less concern for the stupidity sprouting out of peoples mouths while holding their hands out for the next round of cash. Let me put it this way 'the more foolish you speak the more foolish you'll sound.' So why not shut-up? Why not go with the flow and be sensible and join in and help accomplish a bill that will work for everyone? Why keep fighting this?, it will only work against your own betterment. Lets hear part of the latest rhetoric here....
Covenant Party chair slams Cohen
Covenant Party chair Alvaro Santos says he is “deeply offended” by the political behavior of David Cohen, the deputy assistant secretary of the Interior. “I am deeply offended by David Cohen's remarks,” said Santos. “I resent David Cohen's unprecedented intrusion into our self-government and local politics. Santos characterized Cohen as “an unelected federal politician with dominion over our Commonwealth.”According to Santos, Cohen has morphed into a completely different person politically after the 2006 power shift in the U.S. Congress. “He is a hypocrite and political opportunist,” declared Santos. HIS WHOLE STORY HERE
David Cohen is only doing his job, slinging mud at him will have no effect but to make him less and less willing to give a shit about you anymore. Between these idiotic remarks and the even more idiotic remarks by the governor this boat is as good as sunk already. Give it up and help!
Wake up! Get a grip! Take you head outta sand! Or just take what is given, with no input of your own. They will do it with you or without you. You have the freedom of choice.

.....GED.....

546- A WISE OLD MAN

THE OLD MAN WAS CLEVER... THE OLD LADY WAS FOOLED

Here is how the story goes........
Older but not Wiser
A woman decides to have a facelift for her 50th birthday. She spend$15,000 and feels pretty good about the results. On her way home, she stops at a newsstand to buy a newspaper. Before leaving, she says to the clerk, "I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?" "About 32," is the reply. "Nope! I'm exactly 50," the woman says happily. A little while later she goes into McDonald's and asks the counter girl the very same question. The girl replies, "I'd guess about 29." The woman replies with a big smile, "Nope, I'm 50." Now she's feeling really good about herself. She stops in a drug store on her way down the street. She goes up to the counter to get some mints and asks the clerk this burning question. The clerk responds, "Oh, I'd say 30." Again she proudly responds, "I'm 50, but thank you!" While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man waiting next to her the same question. He replies, "Lady, I'm 78 and my eye sight is going. Although, when I was young, there was a sure-fire way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra. Then, and only then can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are." They wait in silence on the empty street until her curiosity gets thebest of her. She finally blurts out, "What the hell, go ahead." He slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around very slowly and carefully. He bounces and weighs each breast and he gently pinches each nipple. He pushes her breasts together and rubs them against each other. After a couple of minutes of this, she says, "Okay, okay...How old am I? "He completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and says, "Madam, you are 50. "Stunned and amazed, the woman says, "That was incredible, how could you tell? "The old man says, "I was behind you in line at McDonald's."
Now you know the whole story..... Have a good tomorrow!
.....GED.....

545- A TRUTHFUL QUOTE

A QUOTE BY TONY BLAIR

"A SIMPLE WAY TO TAKE
MEASURE OF A COUNTRY
IS HOW MANY WANT IN
AND HOW MANY WANT
OUT."

.....GED.....

544- NIGHT LIGHTS

A VIEW OF THE WORLD FROM OUTER SPACE

This picture clearly shows where the main population of the world dwells, at at least the ones that have or can afford electricity.

So as they say, " Well keep a light on for you."

(click pic to zoom in)

.....GED.....

542- IDIOT SIGHTINGS

IT NEVER FAILS, THERE IS ALWAYS AN IDIOT AROUND, SOMEWHERE

The trick is to be able to pick out who they are and steer clear, thus we call this idiot sightings.
The following are some examples of idiots that were exposed....
IDIOT SIGHTINGS: Sighting #1: I was at the airport, checking in at the gate, when the airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?" I said, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?" He smiled and nodded knowingly, "That's why we ask."
Sighting #2: The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it is safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged co-worker of mine, when she asked if I knew what the
buzzer was for. I explained that it signals to blind people when the light is red. She responded, appalled, "What on earth are blind people doing driving?"
Sighting #3: At a good-bye lunch for an old and dear coworker who is leaving the company due to "down-sizing," our manager spoke up and said, "this is fun". "We should have lunch like
this more often." Not another word was spoken. We just looked at each other like deer staring into the headlights of an approaching truck.
Sighting #4: When I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up my car, I was told that the keys had been accidentally locked in it. So I went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger's side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered it was open. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "It's open!" "I know," answered the young man, "I already got that side."
Have you ever been exposed to some kind of idiotic actions? Put them down here and let me hear them. .....GED.....

541-THE WOMENS EDGE

REASONS WHY IT IS GREAT TO BE A WOMAN

THEY ARE AS FOLLOWS:
We got off the Titanic first.
We can scare male bosses with the mysterious gynecological disorder excuses.
Taxis stop for us.
We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.
No fashion faux pas we make, could ever rival the Speedo.
We don't have to pass gas to amuse ourselves.
If we forget to shave, no one has to know.
We can congratulate our teammate without ever touching her rear end.
We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.
We have the ability to dress ourselves.
We can talk to the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.
If we marry someone 20 years younger, we are aware that we will look like an idiot.
We will never regret piercing our ears.
There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.
We can make comments about how silly men are in their presence because they aren't listening anyway.
But as for me.. I'll choose to remain a man and scratch my balls from time to time when needed, and fart when feeling 'pressured' to do so.
.....GED.....